What will it cost you?

You can almost predict it.

You get some good momentum going.
You’re in control.
That crazy goal you set suddenly seems possible.

And then…

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Something happens that knocks you off our feet, and sometimes completely off course.

ONE WEEK AGO

I took my (fur) boy in for a follow-up vet appointment.  A month ago, a blood test revealed some levels to be a bit on the high side.  The doc prescribed a pill for him to take for 30 days, and we were now waiting to see if that magic pill helped.

It didn’t. In fact, most of his levels doubled. And the sucker punch? It cost me $80 just to find out this news.

But, I think deep down…I knew.

You see, I first found out something was up with my pup about nine months ago.  A routine procedure was bypassed because of the sudden presence of these high levels. I was given a list of possible causes and a list of possible tests we could run.  I chose a few…ones that would likely prove what the doc thought was most likely the underlying problem, and ones that wouldn’t break the bank.

Unfortunately, these tests didn’t clarify anything.  They just left us with more questions.

It was suggested that I do another test, but the cost of it made me hesitate.  Rather than spend $500 on a test that wasn’t guaranteed to provide answers, I opted for the occasional $15 test to monitor those pesky levels, which, over time, slowly started to decrease.  This, mixed with the fact that my pup wasn’t acting any differently or showing any signs of something wrong, left me I feeling okay with my decision.

Until last week, when the doc told me what I needed to hear:

He isn’t showing any signs of something wrong on the outside…yet.  But trust me, with numbers this high, something is brewing in there.

He suggested we run that same test I’d been avoiding.

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WHAT WILL IS COST YOU?

A pit formed in my stomach.  Sure, I had been making good progress paying off my debt and this was most definitely going to slow that down, but spending the money wasn’t what had me feeling sick; it was the fact that I had focused more on the cost of doing the test than the cost of not doing it.

For one, to avoid doing that one test, I did several other cheaper tests that ended up costing about the same overtime anyway.  It’s like when you’re craving a brownie, and you eat no less than eleven “healthy” snacks to avoid eating said brownie.  You would’ve probably ingested less calories if you  just listened to your gut in the first place, right?

But secondly, avoiding the test could have potentially cost me more time with this furball.  In pains me to think even delaying may have taken some time from us.  The dog mom guilt is thick right now, but it is reminding me of a truth I’m seeing a lot lately as Anders and I make steps to design a life of our choosing:

So often, we avoid doing something because of what it will cost us…in the present tense.  Fear of the unknown is paralyzing.  We’d rather put up with the beast we know and mumble “it is what it is” than risk everything we have for the chance of seeing what could be possible.  We fear losing it all so we end up stopping short of taking action.

But what about what you could possibly be passing up?

The life you could be living?
The dreams you could be achieving?

What if you come to the end of your life and all that you could have been is revealed to you?

Is that not more terrifying?

Is that not worth the risk?

Friends, I’ll get my debt paid off…but I’d much rather be in debt with dog breath here than out of debt with nothing but his memory.

So the next time you wonder what something will cost you to dive in, take the money aspect out of it.  Instead, ask yourself…what’s will it cost me if I don’t jump?

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Hint: if you simultaneously want to pump your fists in the air as you let out a rebel yell AND pee your pants and hide…you’re on the right track. KEEP GOING.

Is your gut pointing you in a direction you’re afraid to follow?  Tell us about it in a comment!

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